Friday, September 17, 2010

On Dreams

Since my brother's death three months ago, I've had a number of dreams in which he has made an appearance.

The first dream came a few weeks after the funeral. I don't remember much of it, but what I do remember is actually incredibly comforting. I said to him, "I don't have a brother anymore," to which he replied (in that wry, "you are being ridiculous" voice he used a lot, if you knew him), "Yeah, you do."

I don't know what I believe about dreams, or the inner workings of the brain. There are many religious traditions about those who have passed on appearing to their loved ones in dreams, but I think a lot of that might just be wishful thinking. "Wish-craft," my mom calls it.

Whether it was actually my brother's "spirit" or just my mind trying to come to terms with the enormity of my loss, I do take comfort in knowing that even though he may be physically gone, he will never actually be gone. He lives on in our stories, pictures, and memories. And regardless of why I dream about him, I hope it never stops.

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