Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Yahrtzeit & Unveiling

This past weekend, I attended the wedding of my fiance's cousin. It was a beautiful wedding, but afterward it made me incredibly sad that my brother will be glaringly absent from mine.

Sunday night began my brother's yahrtzeit (Hebrew anniversary of death). I went to shul (synagogue) to say the Mourner's Kaddish, a special prayer recited in memoriam of a loved one who has died. It was harder than I thought. We drove up to my parents' house and lit a memorial candle.

A tradition has developed among American Jews to officially "unveil" a headstone. We held the unveiling for my brother's headstone yesterday. Baninu v'achinu ha'yakar. Our precious son and brother. That's what his headstone says. It felt so surreal to be sitting there reading my brother's name on a block of marble. A few of my brothers close friends attended, and his best friend said a few beautiful and heartfelt words about what he missed most about my brother being here with us.

I spent the weekend thinking about time, and how I didn't get enough of it with my brother. How much time we all waste on stupid little things, instead of on the important things, and that you never know how precious time is until it's gone.

I miss him so much.

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